I often feel alone and confused when news breaks of prominent, upstanding men "of note" are discovered in adulterous relationships...or worse. It's like the little girl inside of me hiding somewhere who still believes in Prince Charmings and Romeos suddenly gets choked up and says "are all men capable of such treachery?"
To which, of course, the answer is yes. All men are capable. Just as all women are capable. All humans are capable of doing whatever they want at anytime. Das is FREE WILL. However, the ability to control our own mood swings, identify and face our fears, and conquer our bad habits is probably a good sign that we won't be given to unconscious or conscious social transgression after promising a lifetime of loyalty to another person. I'll work on me, you work on you.
Here's a NYT article on why men of prominence cheat:
"Feelings of inadequacy, a longing for paths not taken, or a sense of gratification too long delayed can prompt the taking of one small risk, one awkward advance, and then another, therapists say. It’s easy to ridicule such motives, and they do not justify the harm done to others when the chairman reaches for the cookie jar, or the thigh of a Congressional page." From NYT: A Sexist Pig Myth
Meanwhile there are pages and pages of information on famous cheaters, famous mistresses. Where is the research on the greatest husbands of all time? The most loyal couples? The strongest, most supportive wives? I'm looking, I'll let you know.
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
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